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2003-07-24 - 1:58 p.m.

Yeah, so today's been really great.

I went out to get lunch and sneezed while I was driving. Apparently I had a nosebleed at the time, so yes, I sneezed blood all over my white shirt.

One might think that the universe would consider that enough and cease adding to the problems. But one would be mistaken.

I got back to work and was all set to get out of the car when I realized that my keys were not going to come out of the ignition. Nope. No way. I pulled and tugged, and turned the car on and off several times. No dice.

Then I realized that not only could I not get my keys out, but that it's not until the keys come out of the steering column that one can unlock the doors! That's right, I was locked in my car in 90+-degree heat.

I screamed several times because I was so fucking angry, but of course that didn't work so I looked at my car manual.

They had a whole topic devoted to not being able to remove one's keys or get the fuck out of the car.

I had to open a compartment on the bottom of my steering column and reach in there and push some weird switch while turning the keys.

Yes, that worked. But I had to DISMANTLE THE FUCKING STEERING COLUMN TO GET OUT OF MY CAR.

Then I went into work and dropped my sandwich on my pants.

It's been a good day.

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