Diary of the Red Queen, Mama & Lunatic
Diary of the Red Queen, Mama & Lunatic
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2001-07-06 - 4:24 p.m. I arrived at work today, fifteen minutes early, and cried in my car. I know I didn't mean for this diary to be maudlin, but I'm just so upset right now. I feel like I can't get ahead. I have a good education. I went to Northwestern, for God's sake. That's in anyone's top ten list of colleges in the country, and excluding Ivy League bias, is often in the top five! And I graduated, which is more than Mr. NRA Charlton Heston can say (of course, he's pretty incoherent, as he sent a letter to the campus newspaper denouncing it as too "liberal". In that letter, he also mentioned that there are twelve amendments in the Bill of Rights, and that there are twelve Commandments. Really, Moses? Putz.). But I cannot find a job that will pay me anything more than slave wages. I cannot find a job that will enable me to live on my own in a simple one-bedroom apartment and still pay all my bills. I don't have credit card debt. All the debt I have is my car loan, and I still can't make ends meet. How do I get along without a cell phone, I'm asked. Easy. I can't afford one. When I am out on my own, how will I get along without cable TV or an ISP, or likely even a phone line? I won't be able to afford them, either. Nor will I be able to afford to do laundry at the coin laundromat. I will not be able to afford fuel for my car. on and on... And there are so many of us who are smart, with or without university educations, and we're being totally overlooked. I do not know what the secret is. I feel like I missed some all-important interview that everyone else from my school got to go to, which is why they are all making 2-6 times as much as I am. I applied for several receptionist positions a few weeks ago. This is not my favorite thing to do, but I'm quite good at it. I have a great phone manner, can file and type with the best of them (typing 100+ words per minute), and have a really good memory for details. I can also write and edit well. AND I WENT TO A REALLY GOOD COLLEGE. But I am apparently not "smart" enough to get a receptionist position. These people did not even bother to send me an e-mail saying "Fuck off," which would not have cost them so much as a stamp. Most of the time, I like the world pretty well, but on days like this I just utterly hate it. TRQ
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